And Then There Were My Thoughts: A Blog About Anxiety
Anxiety makes me feel like I’m hard to love. I feel like no one understands. I can’t stop thinking, I don’t know how. It’s uncomfortable. It’s draining the life out of me. I’m exhausted. I just want to turn it off. I’m tired from sitting and doing nothing but thinking. I can’t focus on what’s important because I’m too worried about things that haven’t happened yet.
Those are just a few of the things clients have shared during their most vulnerable seasons of battling anxiety. I must be honest as say, when hearing these things, the connection comes immediately, as I once too, felt the exact same way. During my toughest battles with anxiety, even as a mental health clinician, I felt hard to love, misunderstood and like I just wanted to turn off my thoughts. It’s not easy to be so transparent as a therapist, but in appropriate settings, I feel its extremely important to do so. It helps clients to know that therapist are human too. We are individuals with our own life circumstances and our own struggles. We just happen to come equipped with knowledge and tools to sufficiently navigate those situations.
Anxiety disorders are one of the most common mental illness in the United States, affecting some 40 million adults age 18 and older; or about 18% of the U.S. population (Anxiety & Depression Association of America). While everyone, at some point in time, experience some form of anxiety, an anxiety disorder has the ability to interfere with a person’s normal level of functioning and impact so many areas of life in a negative way. Because anxiety is something that I have dealt with myself and one of the major things that my client’s struggle with, I decided to take today to share "My Truth" about anxiety and how I worked to combat it during my most difficult times, in hopes that it brings awareness helps you to understand that it is possible to live a life of joy and not be controlled by anxiety.
My Truth About Anxiety: how it impacted me and what I learned from my own personal experience.
Anxiety is a real thing that often can't be turned on and off like a light switch.
Having a high functioning anxiety disorder means, still being able to do life, but having life be very difficult to do, at times.
Having a more severe struggle with anxiety can lead to feelings of not wanting to do life at all, but with therapy and some work, it’s possible to get through it.
OVER has became a common word in how I described myself. I OVER think, OVER analyze, OVER worry, OVER care, OVER love...you get the point.
People with anxiety disorders are not for everyone. I tend to not let many people close to me, because most people simply don't get it, and well... that's okay.
I could sit at home all day doing nothing and STILL be extremely exhausted at the end of the day, because sometimes... battling my thoughts is as tiring as running a marathon.
I was often in a battle between what I know to be correct and true; and what I feared may happen.
Anxiety is typically the result of past trauma, failures, hurts and scars
Sometimes..., a lot of times, it didn’t affect me at all, but when it did, it was bad.
Overachievers are among some of the most likely to be diagnosed with anxiety disorders... (wait... there is that OVER again).
My anxiety disorder never impacted my ability to succeed academically, but I saw a close friend fail classes while struggling with hers.
My anxiety showed up most in romantic relationships (makes sense, given my history of heartbreak, headache, and mistakes).
A combination of spiritual and physical fitness seemed to help me combat my anxiety the most.
However, my anxiety sometimes had me feeling unmotivated to stay on top of spiritual and physical fitness.
I made a daily decision to not let it defeat me.
I learned to take life a day at a time.
You have to be willing to fight like hell to not let anxiety control your life.
I learned to truly value the people in my life who are patient with me and love me despite my OVER.
A little extra love, attention, reassurance, and support can make all the difference
It's a thin line between okay and not okay.
There are lots of treatment models for anxiety: mindfulness, exercise, psychotherapy, cognitive behavioral therapy, and prayer are the ones I found to be most effective.
There is a thin line between anxiety and depression.
Not ignoring how I felt helped me to stay on top of my mental health.
I started to seek people and connections who could handle my OVER... those who can't... are simply not my people.
At the end of the day I had to commit to becoming well and even now, I have to commit to overcoming any situations that may come up
The fact that I have lived through and still occasionally battle anxiety creates a really soft spot in my heart for helping women and mom’s who are struggling with it as well. While experiences with anxiety vary based on the individual there are common themes that seem to show up. Seeking therapy for anxiety can help you to: 1. Know that you are not alone. 2. Equip you with tools, coping skills and resources to help you better manage your anxiety. 3. Help you feel you have more control over your life (become the BOSS of your life).
Battles of the mind are some of the hardest battles to fight because they come with little to no instruction and are often won after an extended time of trying to figure it out. The best thing that you can do for yourself when dealing with anxiety or any mental illness is to pay attention to your body's natural warning signs that tell you when it's time to seek help. The sooner you seek help and start doing the work, the sooner you can live a more enhanced life. You don't have to live every day wanting to turn off you thoughts and hide under a rock. While the struggle is definitely sometimes real... your reality can be Healthy, Whole and Highly Functioning. The goal is to overcome any Mental Encounter!
